Hey, guess what? It really is ALL ABOUT YOU…and I mean that in the best possible way! Read on to learn the final, essential ingredient for creating positive change in your life.
Last week I gave you a 5 step process for seeing your day (and really all the events in your life) differently whenever you’re tempted to fall into a negative point of view. The key is using last week’s Step #5, but in a very specific way.
Today I’m going to actually encourage you to “turn the camera around” and focus the lens on yourself.
Seeing life as an ongoing series of important “selfie” moments is actually the key to never feeling like a victim, and to not losing direction or forward momentum for any length of time.
Why? Because In order to create a positive intention for any given moment, let alone the whole day, it is imperative that you are aware of how you view yourself as well as how you see the external events that make up your day.
Notice that I’m not talking about being self-absorbed or self-important, or going around thinking you’re better than everyone else! I’m talking about taking incredibly good care of your emotional equilibrium, by catching yourself when you start to feel anything less than confident, worthy and capable and bringing yourself back to that place.
It’s All About Filters
It’s all about feeling good first, maybe for no logical reason at all, so that you set your mental “filters” to let in only information that points to and reinforces what’s strong and resilient about yourself. It’s a little bit “fake it till you make it” – a choice to feel great first and know that the reality will follow.
Because if you feel powerful and secure, and peaceful in your self-confidence, you’re not likely to spend more than a second or two entertaining thoughts about what could be bad, hard or upsetting about what you need to do that day. You won’t be interested in focusing on what has gone wrong in the past or could go wrong in the future.
You know how photographers and cinematographers use filters to heighten and enhance the visual appeal of a photo or movie scene? It’s like that – you choose your “how to view this pop quiz or change opportunity” filter in every moment. So look at it as inviting and exciting, and a chance for you to shine!
When you feel that power, self-confidence and optimism, you will tend to notice only what’s possible and inspiring that pulls you into intentional, effective action. All the thoughts and ideas that come into your head and stay there for any length of time will be about seeing solutions, finding opportunities, and the great communications you’re looking forward to having with the other people who can help you accomplish your desired outcomes.
Feel Good Within To Draw Your Attention to What’s Good Outside You As Well
The goal is to find and expand upon that positive energy inside you, over which you have full control, then bring it into your day, instead of giving your power away to life’s stresses – especially those stresses over which you have no control!
Feeling good comes from knowing you can take care of yourself, work successfully toward your desired outcomes, and handle whatever comes up. I’ll spend more time on how to keep creating that good feeling in next week’s article – for now I just want you to know and start reinforcing the concept to yourself that it’s not only completely possible, it’s essential.
This doesn’t mean that you must live in denial, ignoring or denying that there are challenges and problems that come up in life. It simply means that you bring a different energy and attitude to them. I know it may seem right now like that could be a challenge, if not an impossibility.
If so, just commit to trying on feeling good about yourself no matter what is going on in your life. Use affirmations, declarations, and visualization. Ask a friend to gush with praise about you for 30 seconds – whatever works best for you in that moment (then return the favor!). Have fun with it!
Notice the great people, places and things in your life – including your accomplishments, however seemingly small. They are all in your life because you have attracted them to you! Add to that your vision of your biggest dreams, and all your most audacious plans for the future. You’ll see there is a LOT about YOU to feel good about!
Remember what the great American composer and lyricist Irving Berlin stated:
“Our attitudes control our lives. Attitudes are a secret power working twenty-four hours a day, for good or bad. It is of paramount importance that we know how to harness and control this great force.”
Focus in the coming week on accepting that it’s possible that simply choosing to feel good about yourself can change your life. Start getting curious by asking this question about stressful events in your life: “How could I possibly have a good attitude about myself in this clearly upsetting situation?!” (It can even start as a complaint, but let it evolve into an actual question!) Let your imagination come up with every creative idea it can generate, from serious to silly and everything in between.
Don’t worry about getting it “right” or solving any particular problem – just keep playing with the idea and notice how feeling good about yourself changes every experience for the better!